Here I am at 31wks in my pregnancy. I am thrilled to have made it this far as having Jude early is a real concern for me. My Periontologist, OB, and myself are aiming for 35 wks at least. Once I get there we will shoot for 39! I am very excited about this. Having Aaron at 33.5 was very scary. Actually when I was 31wks with Aaron is when I was admitted to the hospital and didn't leave for 3 wks and left with a baby! So it feels nice to be home and to have things running along smoothly so far.
I'm still on house arrest but I've gotten out a few times. I was able to go to my best friend's bachelorette party. Well at least the dinner portion. We went to an awesome Japanese restaurant downtown Milwaukee where I dined on smoked squid salad, pork belly, unagi, fatty tuna, and a tempura soft shell crab roll. Plenty of options for a pregnant women at a sushi place. Actually majority of the menu was cooked items. We then went to a champagne lounge where we where served champagne and delicious truffles. I indulged on the truffles and had a non alcoholic fruity sparkling drink of somekind! Then it was time for me to leave as I was getting tired and the ladies where going to go out and dance and drink the night away! It was really good for me to get out and see my friends. I really don't get to see many people anymore and one can go crazy being couped up all the time. I'm still following doctors orders of not standing for more than 30minutes at a time and keeping my stress level low.
As far as my health, I think we are doing good. I don't want to jinx it. But my blood pressure has never been better and my migraines seem to be under control. I still get contractions and if they get to bad I just put up my feet and call it a night. Everyone has been so incredibly helpful and understanding. It's hard for people to understand exactly what is going on. I know people are wonder if I can leave the house or cook a meal why can't I do this or that or work? Simple. My doctor has told me not to! It's not just the physical aspect that we need to watch but the stress also. Work causes stress, stress raises my blood pressure, that can cause a placental abruption again, and here comes premature baby. That being said I am winding down here and getting very anxious to have Jude, settle into our new normal, and then begin working again.
That's another thing. I've seriously thought about the whole stay at home mom gig. Take away the financial hardships from the decision and it's interesting what I've felt these past few months I've been at home. On one hand I have LOVED the time with Aaron. Spending so much time together has been just wonderful. Also the lack of stress of having your schedule revolve around work is pretty nice too. I've been available to see family a lot as well. I was able to be with Oma every single day and my grandparents, uncles, dad, mom, etc have all been out to the house numerous times. Then I think when I am physically able to do more around the house, how nice that would be to do all the little projects everyone thinks about but never does. How nice to have laundry done, dinner every night, house cleaned, etc. It would be great to be there for my children everyday. I have never ever considered staying at home before this pregnancy. Mostly because I didn't think we could ever afford me too and secondly I just loved my job. I do envy women that get to stay at home and most seem pretty happy with the decision. I wouldn't want to stay at home permanently but until the kids where in school.
Here's the other hand to the argument. I do love working. I love being a part of something bigger. I like learning, meeting new people, and being creative. I enjoy having something of my own. I am also very proud of the work I've done and how much my skills have grown. I also do better mentally when I have a job. I tend to dwell less and am less likely to fall into a funk. Overall, I enjoy being a working mom or just working in general. I like to be busy and focus on something other than my home. So taking both of my thoughts on this I think that I am better off working. Both for my mental state and the obvious financial state which has to be taken into consideration. Could we afford if I stayed home? Maybe. Would it be easier on us if I worked? Definitely. I wonder how moms make this choice and if many struggle with it. Also is the consideration that I do want my children to be exposed to other children through daycare or preschools. So much to consider....
My plan is to go back to work. I really think that is the best option for me. However, I totally admire moms that do stay at home. I do not think staying at home is the "easy" way to do it. Just the opposite. I know how much work that is as well. I'm a very social person and one of the things I miss most about working is the social interaction with my coworkers, volunteers, public, even the Wil-Kil Exterminator guy. He taught me all I need to know about the Brown Recluse Spider and how to manage the hornets nests at my house.
I haven't really done any research on the difference between kids with stay at home moms or kids with working moms. I haven't done much more than just consider my own situation. I am curious to how other moms have made this decision and if they regretted it. Or if they went back to work and wished they where home. I've also considered that it may be difficult to go back to work after being at home for a number of years. I think it helps that my job involved helping animals and people. That gives you a bit more motivation to want to return. I don't know how I would feel if I had worked in the corporate world before. If you are a mom and reading this, give me your thoughts. What you decided to do and why?
Hi Al! Surprised you don't have a full-blown duel going on here yet. :-) I'll tell you that I've been mostly home since Henry was born almost 4 years ago. We make this choice as much for us as for the boys. Like you've already started to notice, life can be a lot less hectic when one person focuses entirely on running the house and family. Also, I am already appalled at how quickly these years are passing, and I personally want to experience as many of these moments as possible. (This is not to say that every day is a beautiful, picture-perfect experience. There are days when I wish I could hand a cranky or teething child off to a day-care worker for a few hours and re-enter the world of adult conversations and uninterrupted work time. But I've witnessed every first my kids have had, and I can't trade that in!)
ReplyDeleteI did work a flexible, full-time schedule for most of the 2009-2010 school year while Todd completed a career change. I ended up needing an MRI of my brain because the stress led to a few scary health issues. As hard as that time was, I'm glad I experienced it because it affirmed that, for me, this is the right choice. It's tough to live on a budget, to talk to friends who are able to put away money monthly for future college expenses, to live in a small, one-bathroom house, etc..., but it's a constant choice we keep making every time a good-paying job opens up that I could apply for. We're banking on this paying off in other ways and being able to catch up financially once the boys are in school and I return to work. With the economic uncertainty lately, though, it is more scary to keep betting on that future earning potential.
HaHa. I'm probably no help. It's a very gray-area issue that everyone makes for themselves. I've come to appreciate, though, that with very few exceptions, moms are just doing what they believe in their hearts to be the very best for their families. So, as long as that drives us, our kids will thrive. :-)