Excuse Me Ma'am, Your Baby is Showing, Breastfeeding in Public

I think this post may be long overdue for me. This is an issue that I feel very strongly about and try to be as much of an advocate for breastfeeding as possible. Today I came across this article and it sent me into a rage. Basically, a women was breastfeeding her 11mth old in a store using a carrier and cover (although that is not necessary BY LAW) and the store owner asked her to either go to a different store, go outside, or just stop. She couldn't believe what she was hearing and the store owner's defense is "there's a time and place to breastfeed". Yeah, it's called when your baby is hungry.

Here is the link to the story
http://www.chicagobreakingnews.com/news/local/chibrknews-nursein-protest-in-downtown-dekalb-20110602,0,2784509.story

What astounds me is the ignorance of people who have a problem with woman breastfeeding in public. I often hear "Why don't you do that in the bathroom?". Let me ask you when the last time you sat on a toilet in a public bathroom and ate a sandwich? Why should my infant have to? Most nursing mothers (including myself) use some kind of fashionable coverup. Mind you that this is mostly for the comfort of others as the baby typically hates it and it's difficult to get settled and the baby latched when you are covered. I honestly could care less if someone sees my boob when I'm nursing. But since I am considerate of people around me who may be less than comfortable with breastfeeding, I will cover up. Even on 100 degree days I will use a cover which is essentially a blanket, and put it on my child's head so you can sit at ease.

When has this country become so offended by boobs? Don't even get me started on facebook banning pictures of mother's nursing their babies. Breasts  really only have one function and that is to feed a child. It has been proven time and time again that breastfeeding is best. Children who breastfeed have fewer allergies, less asthma, better immune systems, and higher i.q.'s. I can provide sources if you don't believe me. Yes, sometimes women cannot breastfeed. There are many formulas available but there are still over 30 nutrients that cannot be replicated in formula. Now if a mother chooses to not nurse and use formula, that's fine. I really don't judge. I am aware of how hard it is to nurse or pump breastmilk when you have to go back to work. After Aaron, I was lucky enough to have my own office so I was able to pump breastmilk whenever I needed to and lock the door. Not being able to nurse or pump will make your milk supply dwindle therefore making it virtually impossible to breastfeed. This is not the mother's fault, but the fault of society to make the mother feel guilty about needing to stop working to provide food for her child.

This might be a good place to include that it is AGAINST the law to ask or prevent a woman from breastfeeding in either a private or public place. Here's a quote from Wisconsin's law:

"A mother may breast−feed her child in any public or private location where the mother is otherwise authorized to be. No person may interfere with the right of a mother to breast−feed her child as provided in this section." 

Under the general penalty provision in Wisconsin state law, a person violating this statute would be subject to a fine of up to $200.

So whether you are uncomfortable with it or not, to bad because the law says we can do this. But the fact there has to be a law is a bit disturbing. My son, Jude, exclusively breastfeeds. Which means he has no other source of nourishment other than what I produce. Sometimes he will get a bottle of pumped milk. However, this is not what he nor I prefer. It's not just about the nourishment but also the bonding that goes on between a mother and a child. There is no greater feeling or sense of connection than when you feed your baby. I always knew that I would nurse my children. And I know it's not always easy. It wasn't easy for me the first time around either.

Aaron, as most of you who read this know, was born prematurely at 33wks via c-section. After taking him out of me they let me say hello and whisked him out of the room. I didn't get to touch him, hold him, or try to nurse him. I felt that a special moment of bonding had been taken away. They brought me back to my room to recover and I was hooked up to about a million machines due to a severe staph infection, preeclampsia, and abrupted placenta. I didn't get to see my new born first baby for about 8 hrs! For all you moms you can imagine how hard this was. I knew he was in good hands and was where he needed to be. I tried to focus on getting better and providing him milk. Because of his prematurity and the c-section, my body was unaware of the fact that it should be releasing some milk. While I waited for my body to catch up, Aaron was fed infant formula through a tube that went into his nose and down into his stomach called a gavage. This was a bit unsettling to see but so was all the tubes and monitors he was hooked up to at the time. I felt a great sense of insecurity and uncertainty with Aaron in the NICU. I felt helpless most of all. I hated hearing how he was doing and what he seemed to like from women I have never met. I was above all, determined to breastfeed this baby. I felt I would truly feel like his mom if I was able to provide him food. So the adventure began. Adam and I went down to the NICU diligently every 2-3hrs to feed him. I had been released from the hospital as a patient, but we were able to stay at "guests" because we had a child in the NICU.So for two weeks we hunkered down in a hospital room at Aurora Sinai in Milwaukee and changed our own sheets and took out our own garbage. Because of Aaron's size and age he wasn't able to nurse on his own. He simply didn't know how. So most feedings the first week where Aaron getting pumped milk in the little tube that went up his nose and into his stomach. I would hold Aaron to my breast to "mock feed" him and Adam would hold the tube that contained the milk. This is how we fed our child for the first 2 weeks. Finally, Aaron started catching on and eventually became a pro at nursing. I never felt so proud and happy in my life. So while this story is extremely personal, this is why breastfeeding is so close to my heart and soul. I feel it gave my little preemie baby the strength he needed to thrive and grow even though the odds where against him. And now he is a very robust and healthy toddler. I should mention that we did have to add supplements to my milk when we gave him a bottle because of his prematurity. This was to make sure he was getting all the nutrients and calories he needed being out of mommy so early.

Ok, so I am kind of losing focus now but back to the article. For this store owner to act like breastfeeding is equal to indecent exposure is ludicrous. There is nothing indecent about feeding your child when your child is hungry. Baby's don't have the same types of stomachs as adults and it is very bad to make an baby wait to eat when they are hungry. And sorry, but babies don't know when the most "convenient" times are for you. They know they are hungry and they need to eat. Therefore, they should be fed no matter where you are or what you are doing. All stops to feed the baby.

When I nurse in public, I generally don't get hassled. I might give off a "I dare you to tell me to stop" vibe. I pity the person who may ever suggests I go somewhere more "appropriate" like the public toilet (seriously, I am not even all that comfortable using it for myself, let alone feed a baby in there). Also, when I see other nursing mothers I try to give them a reassuring smile that what they are doing is fine and appropriate. I think there is a misconception that women who nurse in public must be exposing themselves. No, we are not and if there is slip or something pops out it is an accident. We are focused on getting our screaming child comfortable and eating not whether we are showing a bit to much skin. Trust me, any sort of sexual innuendo or exhibitionism is the furthest thing from any nursing mother's mind.

Another reaction I hear is that nursing moms are "boob nazi's or breastfeeding nazi's" out to prove a point! A bunch of feminists throwing their feminist ways into your face. Please. All we want to do is quiet our child, less he screams his head off then we get that other "look" from you. What is a reasonable alternative? Staying at home until my baby is weaned? That could be a year or more. Not terribly realistic. I shouldn't have to be a shut in so some narrow minded jerk can walk past me, see a nursing cover, and only imagine the horrors going on underneath it.

I think I may have ranted (sometimes a bit incoherently and probably with terrible grammar) enough. My point has been made. And next time you see a nursing mom, instead of staring at her nursing cover or lack thereof, look at her face. You will see she is insecure and unsure but will do what is right for her baby. Give her a little smile (not a creepy creeperson smile) but a smile to reassure her that you are ok with her providing food her baby. I know I would appreciate it once in awhile. If you disagree with the law, please comment. I would like to know why.

Just for the fun of it:

Banana Strawberry Milkshake

Ingredients

• 1 cup low-fat milk
• 1/2 cup frozen unsweetened strawberries
• 1/2 ripe banana
• 2 tablespoons powdered chocolate drink mix
• 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
• 2 teaspoons white sugar

Directions

1. In a blender combine milk, frozen strawberries, 1/2 banana, chocolate milk powder, vanilla and sugar. Blend until smooth. If consistency is too runny, you may add more strawberries.